Jensen on Demon!Dean and his behaviour (x)

Dean Winchester - the man, who had to die and become a demon in order to love himself. No, that’s not tragic at all…

But really, I am so excited about this version of Dean, because, like I have been saying before, Dean’s ~problem and with that Sam’s and Cas’ problem shifts as well. Because now it’s not so much anymore that Dean doesn’t think he deserves to be saved.

All his worries, his pain: It’s gone, so it’ll be really hard to reach him, because how do you save someone, who thinks he’s found the magic cure? How do you save someone, who doesn’t see an urgency in being saved? Yes, how do you save someone, who thinks he doesn’t have to be saved, because from his point of view he ~is saved.

And well, like Jensen says that is bound to cause some trainwrecks happening, but wow I am SO EXCITED to see Jensen act the hell out of it. I cannot wait!!!

Yes, I noticed that too and it’s confusing me as well. Like, Carver seems to see Demon!Dean more rooted to himself whereas to Jensen Dean has gone off the deep end completely. I just hope that in the end it’ll add up to being awesome, which I am fairly certain about right now. :) But yeah, you are def not the only one thinking there are different interpretations going on. But you know what I love? How Jensen talks about it, you can see he loves to have this opportunity to play Dean with this “devil may care”-attitude turned up to a million. :)

You know what my problem is?

That these spoilers are making me feel so good. Really, it’s kind of dangerous, because right now the right - translates as wrong - personwould have to come up and say the right - wrong - thing to me and I would just go ahead and not care. I really have no idea if this in the end has anything to do with the spoilers at all, but today is one those days that could end up being disastrous, simply because I am in the mood to do stupid stuff. :P Like, you know, I am a lightweight when it comes to drinking. hand me a glas of wine and I’m sick for two days straight (so human or not - with Dean I could never match up, in fact he’d probably have to carry me out of the bar afetr we had like 4 shots or soemthing). Long story short: Really, tonight is one of those nights I am craving a cigarette, a bottle of wine and someone to go on an adventure and just not care about tomorrow.

Anonymous said: Do you think that this Las Vegas thing will last 1 episode? I really hope so cause, supporting destiel (with no hope for them as canon at the moment,but that doesn't change how i feel) it will be frustrating to have this kind of behaviour for more than 1 episode. It's ok to see Dean feeling free but if his freedom is showed for more episodes just with sex it would be too much for me and disappointing. And not just for deancas but also cause i want see other real "bad" things from Demon!Dean

Dear anon,

sorry if I am not making much sense, but all the spoilers are seriously eating my brain. And the ones about Demon!Dean in particular. :)

But to your question. I have no idea. I think we’re going to see a bit of Dean running wild during the first few episodes, but I don’t think all of those episode will feature Dean making out with someone, but rather showing Dean drinking himself stupid, being carefree and really just unleashed or like Jensen said “making up for lost time” and living to the fullest.

I am really excited to see this play out on screen, but I can understand if such behaviour is saddening a few people, who are mainly enjoying Dean and Cas together. I have to say though, I am really not concerned about a longstanding wedge being driven between Dean and Cas though it certainly look that way. But hey, they have to keep it interesting. :)

That being said, I think that we might get some sort of montage showing sort of a “daily routine” of Demon!Dean or something in the beginning of the season, so I guess it’s unlikely the same repetitive stuff will happen, but that they’ll focus on different aspects of this version of Dean they’ll explore over time.

I love what Jeremy Carver said here:

"Well, last year, a lot of our characters were challenged with what kind of person or angel or demon am I going to be? There was a lot of Cas as a human for a little while, Sam had an angel inside of him, Dean with the Mark of Cain. Who am I going to be? This season, I think our characters are going to be essentially forced into a corner a little bit with, this is who you are, be it. And certain things that were grey are going to be a little more black and white. Certain characters will find themselves almost forced into a situation of having to face-off once again." (x)
Because it screams character development and looking into the characters psyches and I am SO DOWN with that. :)

Jensen on Demon!Dean and his behaviour (x)

Dean Winchester - the man, who had to die and become a demon in order to love himself. No, that’s not tragic at all…

But really, I am so excited about this version of Dean, because, like I have been saying before, Dean’s ~problem and with that Sam’s and Cas’ problem shifts as well. Because now it’s not so much anymore that Dean doesn’t think he deserves to be saved.

All his worries, his pain: It’s gone, so it’ll be really hard to reach him, because how do you save someone, who thinks he’s found the magic cure? How do you save someone, who doesn’t see an urgency in being saved? Yes, how do you save someone, who thinks he doesn’t have to be saved, because from his point of view he ~is saved.

And well, like Jensen says that is bound to cause some trainwrecks happening, but wow I am SO EXCITED to see Jensen act the hell out of it. I cannot wait!!!

I want to be HOME, I want to read more SPOILERS…

…I want to see the newest VIDEO INTERVIEWS.
I might have an addiction and need my fix! %) Badly!!!

Anonymous said: *shakes head and laughs* I was just about to ask you why is it all taking place in New Orleans //specifically//. I guess we'll have to let it be. *adds this to the list of unsolved mysteries* Regardless, you've outdone yourself with this one. It's spreading warmth through my very soul and its pain is oh-so-good. An absolutely gorgeous piece of art. Keep'em comin'. Have a an amazing day, darling.

*joins in laughing*

Awwww, I have no idea how to possibly reply to your sweet message really so I am just going to

*hugs and kiss you*

And I will try to keep them coming. :) Thank you! <3 <3 <3

Have a wonderful day as well, hun!

Looking back, one always can see nothing is random. //Even back then when was pretty obvious he was talking about the leviathans, that quote gave me the chills. Still does if I rewatch. Such a great character/episode.

Yes, absolutely. That’s what makes it such fun to re-watch! :) Accidental foreshadowing and stuff relating to things that came far far later, when the episode has probably been already forgotten, is awesome. ;) It’s one of my favourite episode of S7 as well. Plus: It really has a bit of Cain/Colette as well the Chronos and *damn, I forgot his gf’s name* relationship.

Anonymous said: You've made me soooo excited for season 10 and your Demon!Dean New Orleans head cannon is beautiful. I love it!

Good morning dear anon,

I am so excited as well. Each new spoiler that surfaces makes my heart beat a little faster! :)

Glad you like my headcanon! <3 <3 <3

Maybe when I find the time, I am turning it into something more. Like a small multiple-parts-fic or something since I find myself having quite a few more headcanons about Dean spending time in New Orleans, etc. Tbh, I have no idea where the New Orleans thing came from, but suddenly it sat right there in my head. :)


Suddenly remembering how…

…in 7x12 “Time After Time After Time” Chronos asks Sam and Dean after Sam stabbed him right in the heart:

"You wanna know your future? I know your future. It’s covered in thick, black ooze."

Of course it related to the leviathan back then, but I just find it weirdly fitting (though of course no way intended back then as forshadowing) to Demon!Dean right now as well. It’s particularly interesting because Chronos is looking at Dean when saying it. I mean, this is really just a funny co-incidence, but I kind of… like it? :)

"I’ll not rest until I know the cause is fought and won
From this day on until I die I’ll wear my father’s gun” (x)

~~Season 10 Scenarios~~

He hadn’t expected to end up in New Orleans of all places. And least during the summer. But somehow the streets and small bars in the french quater had kept calling him like a lover whispering sweet seducing words into his ears and he couldn’t resist. No, he definitely couldn’t resist. And why resisiting anyway? Resisiting feeling good? Resisting feeling free? He finally felt alive. And feeling like that hasn’t been the case for years. Kind of ironic he thought to himself - "Dying to live" - and couldn’t help but smile while nursing a bottle of whiskey. Why bother with a glas if you could just drain a whole bottle? Especially when the nasty side effects he’d grown used to back when he was human - the hangover, the headache, the shakes - were non-existent now. Back then he drank to forget, now he drank to connect and to enjoy himself. There were no voices to be drowned out now, just sweet liberation to be embraced to the fullest. He found himself bopping his knee to the rhythm of the band - three old guys in their 70s and damn, he had to admit given their age, they fucking owned it - he’s never been an enthusiastic dancer, but the past few months he had developed a taste for it. As he had developed for many other things as well. Like cigarettes and jazz. He glanced to the side. There was a group of people shooting him glances. Maybe he’d take one of them up for a dance. There was at least one girl and one guy, he thought looked somewhat cute and up for some adventure. And adventure that’s what it was all about now. Adventure. He left Crowley behind months ago. "Poor son of a bitch, you really thought you could actually tame me" he thought, chuckled and took another swig from the bottle and draining it. He stood up, knees a little wobbly, but the best kind of way and went outside to have a smoke. It was late, the moon bright up in the sky, but the streets still filled with life. He loved this place. It was like he belonged here. It was like he finally found the light at the end of the tunnel. Or maybe he didn’t. Maybe when your eye-colour matches the darkness within it kind of changes your view and somehow the black doesn’t seem as black as it used to.

Anonymous said: In the upcoming season, Jared (I think) said that we will be seeing who the true monster is. Because Sam will apparently go to bad lengths to save his brother. But, Dean would do the exact same thing. He did the exact same thing with Gadreel. It was with good intentions.(From what I've seen people seem to be more on Deans side about the consent). Another example of this double standard would be about the apocalypse. Numerous characters have put ALL the blame on Sam, when it was equally Deans fau

lt. (First seal last seal, neither brother knew what would happen). An example of that would be in 9x02, when the young Huntress blames Sam for her family being murdered. My point is, some of the fandom, writers, and even actors, put more blame on Sam that doesn’t even belong on him. What is your opinion on this issue?

Dear anon,

I agree with you. Both brothers went to bad lengths to save one another. And while I think S9 was addressing just how damaging Dean’s co-dependecy had become, S10 might explore how it really isn’t just a ~problem of Dean, but one that Sam struggles with as well. What I hope this exploration will end with is the brothers finding a healthy middle ground in their relationship. they need to understand that giving the other person space and not dying for one another does not translate to not caring or not loving each other. This misplaced idea has always been the problem. The problem isn’t that they care deeply for one another and it’s not about making them care less about one another, it’s about them figuring out a healthier way of seeing their relationship.

As for starting the apocalypse: Agreed again, it was absolutely a group effort. Neither brother was aware of what his actions might entail. If anyone would want to play the blame game, he should at least accept that maybe there are two winners (or losers) at the same time. Neither Sam nor Dean are perfect. In fact, they are deeply flawed, complex characters, they are unfair, dick-headed and just downright stubborn asses at times (but that doesn’t change anything about the fact both of them are also caring wonderful people with their hearts in the right place as well) and you know what? That’s what I like about them. :) They are layered, they are complicated, they are real-feeling. For exactly that reason. And I am glad about it, I would want Sam or Dean to be the prince charming riding along on a white horse and as deep as a puddle of ran. I prefer the messed up character with an edge and a darkness to them. And both of these things are aspects of Sam, Dean and Cas as well. And I wouldn’t want to miss any of it.

Misha said in a recent interview that this will be a very character-driven season that really explores all the major characters and their flaws. I am really excited about that. :)

I think that Season 10 has the potential of being a very emotionally impactful season and I think that the show is really getting to its roots of being very character-driven and about personal character struggles. I’m excited about that.

Jul 24

Good morning, lovelies…

…didn’t reallyhave time to be online much yesterday (work is hell atm). Did I miss any other spoilers than the Jensen and Misha interview? Was another video-interview released? Anything?

Also: Wow, hey there dear new followers! *waves and smiles*

Thank you for hitting that button! <3 <3 <3 <3

Random Speculative Thought on Metatron’s “Endgame”


For reasons unknown while burshing my teeth I had to think about Metatron and whether or not his endgame might still be in full motions even though he is now locked up in heaven’s jail.

Visually there have been many instances this season, that hinted at Dean and Cas being set up on opposing sides (whether it was in 9x10 “Road Trip” where Cas stood next to Sam while Dean was closer to Crowley or this imo very telling visual from 9x18 “Meta Fiction”).

Now Metatron seemed to have mostly been interested in setting himself up as a new kind of Messiah (though one that lead his followers to kill - really, I personally found the way the people in the homeless camp acted to be very reminiscent of people infected with the croatoan virus - causing destruction and despair) and most of all hurting Cas in any way imaginable and therefore focusing on the Winchesters and Dean in particular since he knew how deeply Cas cares for him.

That being said, somehow - and even though Metatron simply seems to be doing many things out of cruelty and because he’s getting off on it - I don’t think that Dean’s death was his true “endgame” since it wouldn’t really fit to those hints at Dean and Cas set up on opposing sides.

Sure, Metatron was/is arrogant and there might be a chance that he did not know everything about the blade and its effects and powers (though I doubt it, since he orchestrated the whole confrontation and Dean finding him etc.), him killing Dean might allude to that much, but I am giving him the benefit of the doubt, that driving an angel blade through Dean’s heart and killing Dean, in order to make way for another kind of Dean to rise, was part of his plan alone.

When he tells Cas “Guess what, he is dead too”, he of course might truly think that he killed Dean, BUT he could also just refer to (and yes, I know all of this is highly speculative and maybe stretching things) everything Dean used to be and everything Cas loved (whether you want to see that as romantically or brotherly) and admired about him as a person and human is gone now, because that Dean Winchester truly is dead.

Yes, I think maybe Metatron’s “endgame” to hurt Cas in the most horrible ways might reach further than Dean’s physical death, because Cas realizing what Dean has become (nothing left of the person, he was) might be even more shocking and horrible to stomach than for him knowing - and without a doubt being heartbroken about it - his best friend being dead. Though I guess Cas would hope for Dean’s soul to be at peace in heaven (that is another interesting question btw, now that the angels are back in heaven, are souls and spirits able to ascend again?)

In a way I think this could absolutely fit the levels of cruelty Metatron knows to play (and it would fit with the allusions of Dean and Cas not only being separated, but in any way imaginable truly being on opposing sides, which Metatron might be smiling to himself about up in heaven’s prison, because he is still playing, everything’s still happenign they he wanted it). He has Dean and Cas, two characters so heavily gravitating towards one another, loving one another, being each other’s achilles heel, but also what brings out the best in the other, where he wants them and can hurt both of them most: on opposing sides.

In one corner Dean, a demon, connected to hell.

In the other Cas, an angel (albeit fading away), connected to heaven.

I bet Metatron can’t wait to see those two forces clash.

But there is one thing he forgets, one thing he doesn’t understand, one thing the depth of he is unable to grasp, one thing that changes it all and influences decisions and will resume Metatron’s plan to fail. And the flaw in his plan is the very same one actually that also caused Lord Voldemort to fail: Love.

After reading the last batches of spoilers that came out yesterday about Demon!Dean’s hard partying ways (Anybody else hopes for an episode somewhere between “Hangover”, “Fear and Lothing in Las Vegas” and “Requiem for a Dream”? Cause I do), which I am extremely excited about (especially how Jensen talsk about the situation as an addiction, because there have been so many instances l thought of exactly that - see here and here) and Cas’ position and opinion Demon!Dean, I had to think back on when I wrote this ^^^^ speculating about S10 and Metatron’s endgame and at the moment, I guess it’s not too terribly far off from what we might get.

I have been talking about Dean and Cas being set up against one another visually multiple times over the last season - the most telling one being THIS here imo - and I just wondered if maybe this scene here might in some twisted way - and twisted really seems to be a good descriptor for S10 from what I can grasp - play also into why Cas has struggles with this new Dean.

Of course their bond went far deeper, but I kind of like the visual of a connection breaking. Not just any connection, but Dean’s connection to heaven and maybe with that his connection to Cas (though I am pretty sure it’s not broken just stretched thin). It really is all just a bunch of crazy ramblings, but I am really curious how this plays out. I can understand if many are upset or sad aout the recent spoiler about Cas thinking this Dean has to go, but I think it might actually give an interesting dynamic. To me right now Cas’apprehension about Demon!Dean might stem most from a place where it hurts him too much to see this version of Dean opposed to the man he fell for in more than just one way. And yes, I am also sure in the end there is no way something could truly break Dean and Cas apart. But for now it seems that Metatron’ plan - even if locked up - might still be largely at play…

Anonymous said: I don't think that Cole guy is searching for Dean with good intentions because if i do recall right Jared or Carver said that he (Cole) will cause Sam and Dean some problems.







Dear anon,

I admit when the first spoiler about the mysterious character came out, I immediately assumed he’d mean trouble and would be looking for Dean to ~utilize his new demonness to his own advantage. Just like Crowley seems to have planned (given his actions in S9 and the spoiler about him suggesting a business relationship with Dean that Dean may or may not turn down - hell, if it’s about running hell, I could imagine Dean just saying “naaa, it’s my throne now”). And that seems to not work out all that well for the king, so…

More recent spoilers make it seem that he might rather be a Benny-esque character, but human. Of course he could be after Dean for revenge or whatever and therefore causing problems. But he may also be posing problems for a completely different reason.

Whatever he turns out being (though of course I have my hopes set on some possibilities more than others) I remain excited and curious about the character. How about you, dear anon? :)

I have to wonder whether this new Cole character, if indeed has bad rather than good intentions, is going to serve as a contrast to Sam’s search. Several times, last season especially, Dean has been framed as a tool or weapon to be used eg Magnus, Crowley. Now those instances were directly concerned with dean having the mark of Cain and I believe Carver stated Cole’s intentions were not related to that. BUT I have to wonder, we have Sam searching for Dean the person, his brother who he loves, maybe this Cole individual is searching for Dean the hunter, and by that I mean searching not who he is (even though they share a past) but rather what he does (or can do). And perhaps these two searches are further symbols of choices Dean must make or conflicts he is facing, between humanity and ‘other’. Just some thinly thoughts.

The tweets Travis Aaron Wade sent out does make it seem he rather is playing a ~bad guy. *crazy btw how the feelings on one character can change so fast based on just some tiny words someone send out into the world :* I very much like your idea. That was my initial thought, that Cole is seeking out Dean, because he wants to use him for his own advantage whatever it may be. There also lies the possibility that he is looking for revenge for something Dean did way back in the day (maybe he hooked up with Cole’s gf? - though for my taste this would be VERY meeeeh). But in general the idea of why people are looking/~hunting for different versions of Dean so to speak, I find interesting, it fits to the whole being loved just cause vs. being ~loved because of… that Dean has been struggling with all his life.

If Cole was another character pulling Dean towards the darkness it would certainly contrast nicely with Sam, who is (probably by going way dark himself just in differeing ways to Dean) trying to pull Dean towards the light.

Question to me really is right now, is he hunting Dean the way Gordon was hunting down Sam with the intention of killing him because of whatever happened back when they met and him realizing that now that Dean is something supernatural it just gives him all the more reason to go through with it or if he is searching for Dean, because he needs Dean’s help/maybe wants to thank him, because back in the day he saved his life or whatever or if he wants use Dean for some questionable quest. Either way at the moment - and especially after Wade’s tweets - it seems he’ll be a rather grey character, so in that vein a bit like Benny really…

I’m not sure how I feel about the revenge angle, because in one way introducing a character from Dean’s (human) past that was wronged would surely mainly serve as a further indicator to Dean that the person he was deserves to be the demon he’s now become. But then maybe that’s the point and why he poses a threat to Sam and Dean, its because his presence risks cementing Dean in embracing his new demon nature because here is yet another example of him being 90% crap.

Good point. And agreed. That’s not what I would want to see either, but I thought about it more in terms of Gordon, who was on a hunt/sort of revenge mission when wanting to kill Sam. And it was completely unjustified and unreasonable of him, so I could imagine something of that kind. I think a revenge scenario really only works for me if it is clear that this revenge mission is unjustified and over the top. Like something of the kind “Dean hooked up with his girl and she left him hanging”, but since that would be too blahhh, it’s unlikely to be the case. I still would like it most I guess - since the son scenario is not the case - is Cole being an old friend from when Dean was at Sonny’s or Stanford era like I said yesterday in my long cray spec post. I’d rather like it if he was looking for Dean to say thank you, because he saved him an being horrified by what happened to Dean and wanting to repay him and help Sam in getting Dean better than him wanting to kill Dean, Though I guess the dark road - based on spoilers seems more likely, at least until new spoilers surface. :)

Maybe he’s Emily’s brother?  The Emily whose murder was pinned on Dean in “Skin”.  That would be an interesting comparison with Gordon if Cole is looking for his sister’s killer.  That was something that got attributed to Dean, but he didn’t do it.

There’s also the possibility it’s someone related to someone Dean actually did kill who had turned into a monster or was possessed or something but Cole thought was simply murdered.

They said Cole knew nothing about the existence of monsters, right?  But surely most of the relatives of all the people Sam and Dean have killed over the years wouldn’t be aware of that.  They’d just think their loved ones got murdered.  If Cole is a trained soldier or ex-police officer or something that could explain his “hunting” skills.  And if he’s gotten to the point of obsession, that could make him more like Gordon than like Victor, and push him over into “bad guy” territory.

He could also be a bounty hunter hired by a relative of someone.  That would make him a Boba Fett to Dean’s Han Solo. :P

I like it!!! That could really work. Also: After reading the Jensen interview about Demon!Dean’s partying ways, etc. I kind of hope this. Cole guy will stumblr upon Demon!Dean stumbling out a club high on endorphines, MoC, alcohol and just pure Demon!Dean and the guy than either getting a flashback to back when he met this sweet nice boy at Sonny’s or during Stanford era and is really ~surprised seeing him in the shape he is in or thinking well now I’ve got all the more reason to make him pay for whatever it was Cole thinks Dean did.